A Memory
The death of Paul Sorvino prompted me to look through my photo albums to find this photo.
It was the early 90s and we were on a friend-trip to Universal Studios. We went a lot since it was close and cheap. I recognized him, but I drew a blank on his name.
Anyway, he wasn’t being mobbed or bothered by anyone as he was walking into a restaurant, so we asked if he’d pose for a photo with us. Afterwards, he stayed and chat with us a few more minutes and we parted ways.
The World Came Crashing Down
I hadn’t opened that photo album in a very long time and I was kicked right in the chest as I flipped pages. Page after page, a LOT of those people are dead. Friends and family and other assorted characters that were in my life at some point.
It hit me hard. I keep forgetting I had this life once. The life I grew up in. These people were all in it and I loved them all so much and I miss them all so much and I would chop off my right arm to hug or talk to just one of them ever again.
The crushing weight of my sorrow and loneliness in the world fell upon me and now I can’t cry hard enough. This is why I have my friends. They’re my family now whether they like it or not. I love them all the same. I hope they know this.
In the off chance she reads this, my only hope is that some day my daughter will wake up and realize how much life we are losing the longer she doesn’t talk to us. I miss her so much and I want to do nothing but help mend her aching heart. Of course, what true mother doesn’t want this? One day she will have nothing but pictures and memories she will feel the weight of it too. I love you Liora. We love you. Still always here for you whenever you’re ready to talk. Keep kicking ass. So proud of you.
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